An Open Letter

Dear Woman on the Blue Line (Morning, 12/22/08),

I appreciate the fact that it is the holidays and you are probably bringing all those bags in either because you: A) like your co-workers and want to shower them with holiday cheer or B) feel obligated to give your crappy co-workers equally crappy gifts/treats. And I know that the floor of the subway is both disgusting when dry and so incredibly scary when wet, like on a morning like today’s was.

HOWEVER!

That does not mean that your presents have the right to a seat on the subway. Especially when there are no other seats. I’ve checked the rider’s bill of rights and no where in there do they mention anything about crappy co-worker Christmas presents.

So, do not give me a dirty look when I gesture for you to move your bags before I sit on them. I’m doing you a favor by not just sitting on them with my smashing green snow pants. Although I might have spared your co-workers from your ensuing crappyness distribution, which would have made them happier.

Oh, and the next time you spend the rest of the ride with your presents resting on my leg? I will tear them to bits.

I don’t like to mess around in the morning.

The Green Monster on the Blue Line


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